Skip to main content

National Cupcake Day 2011

National Cupcake Day 2011 - I always think of muffins as cupcakes' hard-working older siblings. They toiled at their unglamorous but steady jobs while cupcakes waltzed off to Hollywood to try to make it in the biz. As the muffins sat behind the Starbucks counter, they secretly looked forward to cupcakes' not making it and slinking back home with damp and wrinkled frosting.

Then -- well, we know what happened.

Cupcakes made it big. Now they're being photographed with celebrities, they have their own reality TV series, and muffins are still stuck behind the counter, sometimes for days at a time. Cupcakes live in trendier neighborhoods than muffins. You can even buy cupcake carriers to take them from place to place without incident, like small excitable dogs! Cupcakes sometimes are arrested for transporting illicit substances. The most illicit substance muffins will transport for you is bran.

National Cupcake Day 2011

When you call someone "muffin," you picture her as a grandmother, or a cat, or a cat who belongs to a grandmother. When you call someone "cupcake," you're either insulting a big man or talking to an attractive woman in a slightly more sexist era.
Meanwhile, muffins trudge in to work every day and try to keep a good attitude about it. They spill perkily out over the top. But it's not enough. People write articles about how cupcakes are more than just cupcakes -- they're a reflection on our society. Muffins aren't a commentary on anything. They're just a breakfast food. Not that they don't try to keep up. But there are few things more pathetic than a frosted muffin. "This is the general concept, right?" it seems to say. "I don't really get it, but I'll do it. Why don't you love me?" It's like watching your grandmother dress up in heels and a tube top and try to send a text message.

National Cupcake Day 2011
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Contactless Debit Cards

Contactless Debit Cards - Contactless debit cards will make their formal debut in Canada next year with the launch of Interac Flash from Acxsys Corp.’s Interac Association, Canada’s national debit network. Interac’s first two Flash issuers are Scotiabank and RBC Royal Bank, which will roll out their first contactless cards next summer. The first acquirer is TD Merchant Services, a unit of Toronto-Dominion Bank. More issuers and acquirers are on the way, an Interac spokesperson tells Digital Transactions News, though no announcements have been made yet. Interac and the banks tested Flash this summer at some high-volume, small-ticket merchants in downtown Toronto. The spokesperson expects national merchants will be making formal announcements about acceptance. “There’s a lot of excitement in the merchant community,” she says. “Merchants are looking for that faster throughput.” In a statement, the Retail Council of Canada endorsed the new card. “Interac Flash is a welcome and needed
Post a Comment
Read more

The Craigslist Killer TV

The Craigslist Killer TV - Lifetime last night turned the Craigslist killer headlines into a much watched and even more talked about TV movie. The movie told from Ms Megan McAllister’s point of view is chilling, even if it didn’t have her consent. For those who don’t know the story, Philip Markoff a Boston University medical student and fiancé of Ms McAllister met Julissa Brisman on Craigslist and murdered her. Markoff met Brisman on Craigslist, arranged a meeting for a massage. Police at the Boston Marriott Copley Place hotel found Brisman, shot dead and a massage table set up in the room. Brisman, who was 25 at the time, was pursuing a modeling career. Four days earlier a Las Vegas prostitute reported being attacked and robbed by an armed man at a nearby hotel, a stripper at the Holiday Inn in Warwick, Rhode Island reported a similar incident, as well as two more in the area. The Craigslist Killer TV Megan Mcallister, loved and almost married Philip Markoff. The question of thi
Post a Comment
Read more

Farm dogs maul Irish Tourist

Farm dogs maul Irish Tourist - An Irish tourist who was mauled to death by two dogs while visiting an organic farm in Penang yesterday morning had more than 50 bite wounds and lacerations all over his body. Penang Hospital Forensic Department head Datuk Dr Bhupinder Singh, who performed the post-mortem on Maurice Sullivan (pix), 50, today, said he found the wounds on the victim's head, neck, hands and legs. "The victim had died as a result of severe haemorrhage due to multiple injuries from the dogs' bites," he said, adding that there were no signs that Sullivan suffered any ailment at the time of death. Farm dogs maul Irish Tourist Bhupinder also said both Sullivan's ears and the left side of his face were gnawed off in the incident. One of the ears was recovered from the scene. Bhupinder told reporters this after carrying out the post-mortem which began at 10am. Sullivan was attacked by two mongrels at the farm while taking photographs of the gr
6 comments
Read more